Quotes featuring Relc
332 quotes (233 spoken, 99 mentions)
“Shut up.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m glad we didn’t have to kill her.”
“Good evening, Miss Human. I was wondering if my colleague and I could take up a moment of your time—”
“You idiot. I told you this is why I should have opened the door.”
“Move over. Let me show you how it’s done.”
“Hello, Miss. Sorry if we—”
“Good job not scaring her.”
“Shut up. This is your fault. I told you I should go first. I’m not a horrific Ant.”
“Yes, but I have my badge on. You have not brought yours. Again. For the eighth day in a row. Therefore, I was the most logical choice to—”
“What, are you crazy? Let me talk. That was just a misunderstanding caused by seeing your face. I’ll straighten all this out.”
“Hello? Miss? We’re not dangerous.”
“…Are you a Dragon?”
“Am I a Dragon? Aha. Haha. Well, that’s just—oh, Ancestors bite me. I mean, do I look like one? I’m not even Oldblood, but maybe I do. Klb, buddy, what do you think?”
“You are blushing.”
“Be quiet. I’m in a good mood now.”
“Excuse me? I’m not a Dragon, Miss Human. I’m just an incredible Drake in service to the City Watch. Me and my idiot partner were on patrol when we noticed the smoke. May we come in? I promise we won’t bite.”
“Shut up. Are you trying to scare her?”
“Thank you very much.”
“…Hi.”
“Sorry, sorry, Miss. We’re not here to hurt you, I promise.”
“W-want something to eat?”
“Um, sure.”
“Oh, thank you. It’s…blue.”
“Well, I’ll gladly accept. Klbkch, you want any?”
“In a moment. Let’s eat first. This looks good!”
“…So someone on the walls spotted the smoke and called it in. Since it didn’t seem like a grassfire and since we knew this place was abandoned years ago, the Captain decided to send someone to check it out.”
“That’s what I said.”
“See, this. This is why no one else is willing to be your partner. Along with you being, y’know, you.”
“Oh. Right. Sorry.”
“I told you. It’s flattering, but I’m not a Drag—oh.”
“Is, uh, that a bad thing? I mean, it’s a Dragon yeah, but isn’t he…?”
“Of course we wouldn’t eat you! That’s barbaric, and besides, it’s illegal. I mean, okay, sure, it happens sometimes in distant villages, but we wouldn’t do that. Right, Klbkch?”
“Relc!”
“Not you, specifically. Really, it could be anything. We thought it might be a random fire or a few Goblins. If there were some stupid kids, on the other hand, we’d be dragging them back right now since it’s dangerous to stay here. Bandits on the other hand…”
“Well, there’s nothing wrong with you staying here. Aside from dying, that is.”
“It’s just a possibility. This, uh, place is sort of bad. For your health.”
“Why don’t you shut up and let me talk? Look, Miss Human. You’re probably not sick if you’re still walking around.”
“We’re still cool, right?”
“Ooh! Pasta! This is good stuff!”
“I’ll have a glass if that’s alright.”
“…Are you sure you’re not a Dragon?”
“You said it poorly. I am merely rephrasing your words for the benefit of all.”
“Your hurtful remarks are unnecessary. Besides which, I believe we are getting off track. We are in the presence of a member of the general public, remember.”
“Miss?”
“Sorry, but can we ask you a few questions about where you’re from? It’s pretty odd to find a Human out here, let alone in an abandoned place like this. Not that we mean to pry, it’s just that it’s kind of our job to ask these questions.”
“Michigan? I’m not familiar with that city. Or is it a nation…? Is that north of here? Over the mountains, maybe? On this continent?”
“Oh, so are you…lost? Or travelling maybe?”
“Um, I don’t know?”
“Oh, a [Teleportation] spell? Was it a misfire or did someone target you? That’s a Mage’s Guild issue.”
“Look. It’s getting sort of embarrassing. I’m not a Dragon. I’m a Drake. And yeah, we’re distantly related cousins, but Dragons are…there’s no way. That would be huge. You said you saw one? You sure it wasn’t a Wyvern? It was probably a Wyvern.”
“Goblins. And by the way, some Wyverns breathe fire too.”
“A what?”
“Oh, right. Those annoying things. What’re they called, Klbkch?”
“Well, after I got the eggs, there was a crab rock, I mean, a rock crab, and then I found blue fruits before that and…I met you two. A not-dragon and an insect. Who don’t want to eat me? Or is that after the meal?”
“Our pardons. We have not introduced ourselves. Allow me to correct this mistake. I am Klbkch, Senior Guardsman in the employ of the City of Liscor. This is my partner, also a Senior Guardsman.”
“And this blue juice tastes good!”
“Right.”
“But you cooked it, then? Do you have levels in a [Chef] class, then?”
“Oh, I see, I see. That’s convenient. Did you earn them here?”
“Not bad! Especially if you just got here a few days ago. Did the notification wake you up right as you were falling asleep? I hate that.”
“It’s very annoying.”
“And you’re an [Innkeeper], right? Got any other classes?”
“So four levels in…? That’s too bad. But you’re young; leveling takes time after all.”
“…You mean you don’t level in this Michigan place?”
“They have to teach Humans how to level? Weird.”
“Hey, what did you just call—”
“Hey!”
“I believe it was my turn to do that. Apologize to the Human for your rudeness.”
“Shut up. I’m still sorry. But yeah, there’s a big difference. I mean, sure, Humans say we look similar, but we’re totally different. They have those neck frills, and they’re way too colorful. We build cities out of proper stone, but the Lizardfolk live near water and can breathe underwater too, some of them. They have Naga and, like, jungles in Baleros. Whereas we Drakes like drier climates. We enjoy warm sun, open spaces…”
“You’re just an overgrown ant. You be quiet. Anyways, we’re special. Those guys are just amphibians that learned to walk on two legs. We’re related to Dragons. We’ve got special powers.”
“We can breathe fire. Some of us can, at least.”
“See? She gets it. Told you it was cool.”
“I feel I must mention that you, personally, cannot breathe fire, Relc.”
“Only a few Drakes can do it, okay? Not breathing fire is perfectly normal. And some of us can, so there.”
“Shut up. Ahem. We were just sent here to make sure no Goblins or nasty creatures started living here. We’ve got no problem with Humans. Well, at least the non-violent kind.”
“Oh, sure.”
“This really is quite good. How’d you make this all the way out here?”
“What about it? Oh, are you wondering about mine? I’m a [Spearmaster]. This idiot’s a [Swordslayer]. We both have levels in [Guardsman] as well, but not nearly as much as our primary classes. Pretty cool, huh?”
“Uh—thanks. [Spearmaster]. Me. Him—[Swordslayer]. No, it’s cool. We’re [Guards]. Yeah.”
“That’s pretty much how it works. What were you confused about?”
“Oh, that. New classes without an apprenticeship, you mean? Simple. You must have satisfied the requirements for the class, that’s all. I know it’s sort of weird gaining a new class suddenly, but it happens. I knew a guy who gained four levels in [Farmer] just because he kept growing carrots in pots next to his window. Not [Gardener], [Farmer]. I guess it was because he grew lots of carrots. Leveling is weird that way.”
“They can level. Now, about what you just said. I’m not a lizard—”
“Um. Sorry about that. Really. But, uh, can we talk about that name?”
“Yeah. You, um, called me a lizard person, right?”
“…Yes. Yes, it is. I’m a Drake, not one of the Lizardfolk. There’s a big difference.”
“Uh, don’t apologize. Look, maybe I overreacted a bit. I’m not, uh, mad…”
“…Yeah, sorry.”
“Nice rocks to laze about upon while we should be performing our duties.”
“What? It’s a great power!”
“Shut up, Klbkch!”
“Ooh, nasty. What happened there? Looks like a bad cut. Were those Goblins?”
“Yep. Good thing it’s meant to treat light infections too. Klb, are you going to…?”
“Oh no, thank you. I mean, this is probably worth—can I get you another plate? Or—or you could come back. I’ll feed you two again if you want—”
“We wouldn’t?”
“Or, and hear me out. Or…we could have more food and stay here longer.”
“Right. Well, let’s be going. Um, sorry about that, Miss. Here, let me just pay for the food…”
“What a lonely girl.”
“I can. It’s the things on her chest.”
“Really? I thought those were birds.”
“Yeah, I’d bet on it. I’m not sure why a Human would be out here anyways, let alone in that place.”
“Shut up. She just seems lonely, that’s all. Why else would a Human female want to hang out with a Drake and an overgrown bug?”
“Even if she was, who’d hide there? You’d have to be mad, or be a [Warrior] or [Survivor] to want to live by yourself. Plus, the plague! Do I look sick? Am I oozing?”
“Bet she didn’t know. And her expression when we walked in—she’s never seen a Drake or an Ant before in her life. Well, the Ant part makes sense.”
“What do you think? I bet she’s some kind of runaway or a child that got separated from her clan. Do Humans have clans? Or is it all [Lords] and [Ladies]? Maybe she’s not even from this continent.”
“You are correct in at least one definition of the word. But speculation is pointless in any case. We investigated the smoke, and now we can make our report. She is not breaking the law since the inn was abandoned nearly ten years ago.”
“Of course not. Why would anyone make a healing potion that hurts when you use it? But look at that!”
“We are still on duty, if you recall. The Captain will be expecting a report. If we do return, we will have more time to socialize.”
“I am sure you would prefer that. But we are being paid to work, not to enjoy ourselves. Moreover, you are eating all of this Human’s dinner.”
“I insist. That blue drink is really good, by the way.”
“Well, we’ll be off then. Good night to you.”
“It was almost certainly safe as I and Watch Captain Zevara assured you repeatedly, Relc. Besides, that young woman’s presence is proof enough. She would be dead within the day if the disease were still present.”
“I would prefer that you call my species by their proper name.”
“Fine. Antinium. Happy?”
“Bastard.”
“What about the Dragon? Do you think she made that up?”
“Yeah. A Dragon? Really?”
“Plus, we’d know if a Dragon lived around here. They’re pretty obvious.”
“So…scared Human female? Not a threat? Probably a traveller? Makes good pasta?”
“Right, right. Let’s tell the Captain and get some sleep. Or rather, I’ll sleep and you do—whatever Ants do to sleep. Sitting-sleeping or whatever.”
“Pass.”
“Oh, definitely. Right after work?”
“Klb! That’s so devious! We can waste hours and say it was all an investigation! Now you’re thinking like a Drake!”
“Go roast yourself.”
“So, a lesser healing potion of no worth, huh? You know, I’ve never heard you lie like that.”
“No, no. It’s for the best. Mind you, I think she figured it out.”
“How are you going to explain that to the Captain, huh? That’s supposed to be special-issue. We won’t even get another shipment of that quality for months, probably! All the way from Pallass once the Blood Fields are frozen.”
“You’re a regular do-gooder, huh? Trying to level up your…[Good Person] class? Is that a class?”
“Sure, suuuure you were.”
“Me? I don’t like Humans. They’re scaleless, hairy, and they smell funny. I mean, this one’s nice, but I definitely wouldn’t want to see what it looks like under those clothes.”
“Ew.”
“—It’s not that I’m not interested. I have an open mind! I wouldn’t mind looking. If I was offered. They’ve got nothing on good scales, but I could get over the fleshiness. Maybe.”
“I have no sexual attraction towards Humans. Unlike you.”
“Deviant.”
“Klbkch and…Drake Guy.”
“Huh. Can Goblins smell poison? Wait…wait. That Relc guy said they have Skills. Do you get Skills to tell if there’s bad fruits? [Bad Fruit Detector]? No way.”
“They said they’d visit. But did they mean that or are they busy? Either way, I can always make more pasta and save some for later, right?”
“They must be busy.”
“Are you done logging out for the day yet?”
“There. I have signed us both out. Again.”
“Great. Thanks. Now, wanna go check on that Human? I hear—”
“Relc!”
“What? Some idiot had to start a fight now of all times? We were going to go back and—”
“But—we’re signed out—”
“What a pain. Let’s smack some scales-for-brains quick. Maybe we’ll still have time to go to the inn afterwards.”
“Aw.”
“I know, I know. But I was going to eat more pasta and—”
“Alright, let’s go. Man, I really hate Captain Z.”
“She can eat my scales. Let’s go and get this over with.”
“Senior Guardsman Relc, belay that! There’s a brawl in the marketplace. Get over there and stop the fighting!”
“…Jerk.”
“Maybe not. But then again, the only two I've met were quite polite, paid for their meal, and didn't try to threaten me when I first met them. Whereas the first Human I met was you.”
“Good morning everyone! Weird Ant behind me, friendly Human, and—oh.”
“Hey, you two! Klb—Klbk? It’s been a while. I guess. But come in. Or come in more. Have a seat. Want something to eat?”
“You multiplied. Can Humans do that?”
“What? Oh no, that’s just Pisces. He’s annoying, so ignore him.”
“I believe staring is considered rude in most cultures. Sit down and cease your rudeness.”
“Please excuse my companion’s lack of tact.”
“I paid no attention. The plebian masses are a burden to be endured; I bear no ill will to the misinformed or ignorant for their rudeness.”
“Humans. They’re so—”
“Do you guys want pasta or blue fruit?”
“Ah. Eh. Um, what I meant was—”
“I would be delighted to try the blue fruit. I believe my tongue-tied partner would like some as well.”
“Right. Food. I’ll have some.”
“Relc.”
“Relc! Right, right.”
“What? How come you remembered this idiot’s name and not mine?”
“Um, sorry.”
“Aren’t I the better-looking one here? What gives?”
“Really?”
“Oh.”
“Relc! I’ve got the name, now. And I’ve got more pasta. Well, it’s old pasta, but it still tastes good! And more blue juice. And blue fruit! It’s, uh, not poisonous if you only eat the outer bit.”
“Ooh, pasta!”
“So, how’re you doing? Level up again?”
“Actually, I did. Right after you two left.”
“Ooh, congratulations! Did you get a new skill?”
“That’s quite useful! Most craftsman and artisan classes get that early on. I guess [Innkeepers] are sorta like that, right? Got to take care of the inn, repair windows, fix tables, and all that.”
“Well, you’ve got the Skill for it, so it’ll be a breeze. And you can buy a hammer no problem. Just head down to the city, and you can get a good one for only a silver coin or two. Tell you what, if you’re ever in the area, I’ll help you get one at a discount.”
“Really? That’s really generous. Thank you.”
“Not entirely. I do believe my companion would earn a small fee for directing any business to his associates.”
“Shut up. Do you have to ruin everything I say?”
“Well…stop it.”
“Nice customer you’ve got here.”
“Sorry.”
“Don’t—don’t do that!”
“Sorry. Again. But…you said rob? As in, that guy over there tried to rob you?”
“And…you let him come back for breakfast?”
“And you didn’t think to report him to anyone?”
“Oh. Oh. I forgot. And besides, you weren’t here yesterday.”
“Yeah, it’s great! Hold on.”
“Hey, you!”
“Do you want something? I don’t do magic upon request. If you seek a certain spell, I would be happy to discuss my remunerations…later.”
“Really?”
“How about you do the magic spell where you turn into a monster? I’d love to see that. Or better yet, do you have a spell to get out of trouble? Because you’re going to need one now.”
“Ah. I see the good [Innkeeper] holds a grudge. Well, I’m not sure what she told you two, but I assure you, I have compensated her more than adequately for my…mistake. It’s nothing two soldiers need concern themselves with.”
“Oh, but it is, it is! And you’re wrong, by the way.”
“We’re no soldiers. We’re [Guardsmen]. And we’ve been looking for the bastard who’s been robbing homes with illusion spells.”
“Good throw, huh?”
“Oops. Sorry, did I scare you? I forgot normal people aren’t used to that. Don’t worry—I never miss when I throw.”
“Good, good.”
“Gotcha. Tried to run from me, did you? No one ever gets away.”
“Klbkch, got anything to tie him up with?”
“Plus, we already know all about you and your crimes.”
“We’ve been looking for you, Mister Mage. Or should I say, the scary creature that threatens travellers and people living by themselves? You’ve been stealing food and money for nearly a month. There’s even a bounty on your head, which I’d love to collect.”
“Okay. Here’s what I’m thinking. Me and my friend here will drag you out back, beat you with sticks or rocks for a while, and then drag you back to the city for a reward. Then we’ll give half to our lovely innkeeper here. Sound good?”
“Too bad!”
“Um. Isn’t that wrong?”
“Wrong? Why would it be wrong?”
“Aren’t there rules? Like, rules against police—guardsmen hurting people once they’re caught? Like…like no beating someone once they’re on the ground?”
“Do we have rules like that?”
“Oh, good. I got worried there for a second.”
“Yes, we wouldn’t want to ruin the enjoyment of mindless thugs like yourself.”
“Hold on, hold on. We don’t need to beat up Pisces. Like I said, he only tried to rob me. And I already hit him with a pot. What’s this about beating him up?”
“Don’t worry, miss. We’ll do the punching outside where you don’t have to see.”
“Or—or you could not. Isn’t that what nice guardsmen do? You could just arrest him and skip the punching, right?”
“Yeah, but he called me a common thug. I want to punch him for that.”
“Well—he’s a jerk. But I mean, you’re a guardsman. Insults like that are ten a penny.”
“Ten a what?”
“What?”
“But one you sign up for, right? I mean, sure, it’s a great job, but—it’s just a job, right?”
“It’s not just a job. It’s a highly prestigious job! Not just anyone can be part of the city guard, let alone a Senior Guard.”
“Signed up? Can you believe this? Humans.”
“Perhaps if you explained our function more properly there would be no need for outrage. Clearly, the nature of guardspeople differs culturally. I thought Humans did it quite similarly in the north, but…elaborate, Relc.”
“Right, well. It’s still not—okay.”
“Look, I’m not sure what Humans do, but in our city, the city watch isn’t like mercenaries or personal bodyguards. We don’t just sign up. We have to be voted in.”
“Really. See, we’ve gotta get at least fifty ordinary citizens to vouch for us before we’re sworn in. And to become Senior Guardsmen like us, you’ve got to get at least four hundred. Impressive, right?”
“Yeah. We’ve got to keep it on us at all times. Some guys wear it on their chests, but it can get ripped off. Besides…”
“Doesn’t stick so well on scales. Anyways, we’ve gotta pay a fine if we lose it, so why risk it, right? I only need it when I want to prove who I am or pull rank, anyways.”
“Fascinating. But it’s still the elevated status of a common enforcer when all is said and done, isn’t it?”
“You’re still under arrest. I can hit you. It’s only because I’m being considerate of Miss Solstice here that I don’t. But I will. If you don’t shut up.”
“Pardon me. I would not dare to interrupt such august personages such as yourself. Please, proceed.”
“Right. Good. Anyways, we’re the ones with weapons, and you’re just a [Mage]. Not a high-level one either or you’d be teleporting away.”
“Don’t worry, Miss. He’s no threat or we’d have taken him out when we first realized who he was. He looked more dangerous than he turned out to be. You see, both of us can tell if we’re in danger or the enemy is strong. This idiot couldn’t even use [Flash Step] properly!”
“You can do that? Like—sensing each other’s power levels? Really? How?”
“A keen observer would discern his opponent’s weaknesses and strengths and make assumptions based on their actions and ability. These two, on the other hand, are just using a Skill.”
“Well, he’s right. We do have Skills. They’re part of our classes, although in my case I’ve got [Dangersense]. But I’m also a former soldier. And Klb? He’s the Slayer. We can tell you’re not hot stuff, Human.”
“My scales aren’t itching, so your Human friend here isn’t that good at magic. They always itch when I’m in danger. That’s not a Skill, either. But your friend can’t even trigger my [Dangersense]. Not even a little ring.”
“But he’s Human.”
“Spoken like a truly ignorant fool. What would you know of magical mastery? My powers may not lie in mere confrontation, but I assure you, I have more power in my fingernails than you have in your entire brutish body.”
“Okay, that’s it. Close your eyes, Miss—”
“Relax. I would prefer not to damage this establishment. Nor would the owner or even you, I suspect.”
“Peh. You should drink. It’ll be the last tasty thing you eat for a long time. Actually, what am I saying? This stuff’s way too good for you. Just remember what you’re missing when we lock you away.”
“If you can.”
“Last I checked, you were within arm’s reach. That means your fancy spells aren’t going to do a thing before I hit you hard enough to make your brains pop out. Trust me. I’ve done it before.”
“I am a powerful [Mage] far beyond your capabilities. Even if your paltry Skills cannot detect my—capabilities—you would do well to be wary of my hidden…capabilities.”
“Well, well. Theft of a corpse and reanimation, no doubt. That’s another big mark on the list of charges. But necromancy, well, that also means we don’t have to bring you back alive anymore.”
“Yes, yes. But we’ll just hit you and drag you back so Miss Erin doesn’t see anything nasty. But you’re in serious trouble now, Mister [Necromancer].”
“Regardless if you know my identity or not, I still believe you will find capturing me no easy task.”
“Humans. You’re so arrogant and crazy. It’s almost funny. If you’re so full of powerful magic, dodge this.”
“What the—”
“Gone.”
“No. I’d be able to sense if he were within a few feet of me. This was an illusion spell. A damn clever one, too. He pretended he was here and walked off while we were busy chatting. Most idiot spellcasters aren’t that stealthy or…when did he creep off? Klb, it was when you let go of him! I didn’t even see the chair move—damn, the chair’s an illusion too! Normally I can hear idiots skulking around even on the battlefield! This bastard tricked me! Me!”
“Right, right.”
“Thank you for informing us of his class, Mistress Erin. Although he posed no threat to either Relc or I, he is far more dangerous than we had believed. I did not notice the illusion spell. I have grown inattentive, lax. Relc as well, but this is a critical failing on my part.”
“Oh, he’s probably as dangerous as a frog in a fight. That’s not the problem.”
“We thought he was just an illusionist. That’s annoying, but really all he can do is scare folks into giving him things. But a necromancer’s worse. Far worse. We could let him go if he was just a normal [Mage], but we’ve got to find him now, and he knows it.”
“So. Does…that mean you’ll be back soon?”
“Less than an hour, but we won’t be able to stay. Sorry. I’ll try to get the patrol out faster, but you know how it is. We’ve got to shift around guardsmen on patrol, set trackers, get armed up, etc.”
“So we’ve gotta go. Why? Are you worried he’ll attack you?”
“The city? What about it?”
“…You mean, you don’t know? By the way, things look smaller in the distance, Miss Solstice.”
“Don’t be snippy. But it’s easy to spot. Look, you can even see it out the window here.”
“Well, yeah. Isn’t it obvious?”
“It’s not a rock. Why are you having a hard time believing me? Can’t you see the buildings?”
“I believe Humans have more limited eyesight than you or I.”
“What? That’s stupid.”
“Look, the city’s that way. It’s only a twenty-minute walk, and there aren’t many monsters along the way. Besides, once you get within a few miles, the area is regularly patrolled, so you won’t have any problems. And if those idiots at the gate stop you—which they won’t—just tell them you know me.”
“And speaking of which…we’ve gotta go. It’s my day off, but we’ll report that annoying Human maggot-mage back at the barracks. If we move fast, we might get him before he runs too far.”
“Hey, Klbkch, coming?”
“Oh, sorry we forgot to pay. We’re in a hurry so—put it on our tab!”
“No one insults me regularly. Except Watch Captain Z and Klb, come to think of it. People like me. Everyone likes us. We’ve got a special job.”
“A rogue [Necromancer] on the loose does nasty things. Even a low-level one can bring down villages if you give him enough dead bodies, and they level fast when that happens. Damn, I’m not going to be the one who let the next Az’kerash get away, Klb. We’re gonna have to hunt this guy down. If we can’t catch him today, I’ll have the Captain send out multiple patrols once we get back to the city. Erin, we have to go, but I think you’re safe if that guy didn’t do anything last time.”
“Males. They eat and eat and eat. And then I have to clean up the dishes. Typical.”
“He didn’t want to tell you the truth! But he and I both know what happens to [Necromancers]. We—any mage possessing even a single level in the class—are all killed on sight in this part of the world!”
“Gotcha!”
“There you are!”
“Klb! Get over here and help! This guy’s slipperier than he looks!”
“[Barrier of Air]!”
“Not likely. I’m gutting you like a fish right here.”
“I assure you, my life is worth far more than you would ever get for me dead. This can all be solved amicably. I will fully cooperate—”
“That’s what I think of your spells. I’m a former soldier of the 4th Wing of the Liscorian Army. I’ve killed more [Mages] than you have levels. Now, are you going to die quiet or will I have to pay for painting the walls red with your blood?”
“I can be ransomed. Quite highly! My school will pay ten—thirty gold coins in whichever denomination you like for my return.”
“What? No! No killing! Do you hear me?”
“Last words, [Mage]?”
“I have only ever done what I loved. Slay me as well, you thoughtless fools. Just like all of my kind. One day—one of us will follow Az’kerash.”
“Nice last words. But remember—your Necromancer died here. Miles from this very spot. The Tidebreaker was his end.”
“I know.”
“No fighting. Not here. And no killing!”
“I don’t care! You don’t kill people just because they practice stupid magic! And you don’t kill people just because you don’t like them! And you don’t kill people because killing people is wrong!”
“He’s a criminal.”
“He hit me with lightning!”
“You punched his brains out! That’s not enough to kill him over!”
“I can’t believe this. Are you defending him? Because he’s Human? Or do you not want the blood in here? In that case, I’ll take him out back and—”
“Are you stupid? I don’t want anyone killing anyone! You can’t do it! I forbid it! It’s wrong! It’s illegal.”
“In point of fact, my comrade’s actions are not—”
“I don’t care! No killing, do you hear me?”
“Then I’ll arrest him, and he’ll be executed tomorrow. Happy?”
“You do that—and I’ll tell all the people who vouched for you that Senior Guardsman Relc arrested someone after a fight he started. You have no proof, no testimony, and I’m pretty sure if you arrest him, that’s illegal.”
“I believe Senior Guardsman Relc does have just cause, Miss Erin Solstice. It is true that his personal sworn testimony would be called into question if you were to speak against him. [Detect Truth] spells would settle that matter, but Relc’s history of inappropriate conduct on-and-off-duty does not help his case.”
“Oh yeah? Oh yeah? Well, this is outside your jurisdiction! You said it yourself—you don’t patrol my inn! Therefore, it is my inn, and I deny your city’s authority here!”
“…I believe I am incorrect. Relc, the Watch has no authority here. This is an independent inn, and the [Innkeeper] is allowed to deny our authority here.”
“Humans!”
“They lied to me.”
“…Right. It’s just that I’m new here. And I’m Human. Nice to meet you. My name is Erin. I, uh, know another guy who works with you. Relc? And Klb…Klb…the insect guy? So yeah. They know me. I’m no threat. And, uh, I saw some Goblins running around a while back. They’re not here right now, but I felt you should know.”
“You’ve got no talent for that game. If you didn’t have [Thick Scales], you’d have cut your hand off years ago.”
“[Iron Scales].”
“It was the last skill I got from my [Sergeant] class. I think you get it in [Spearmaster] as well, but I don’t know. Either way, it’s a life-saver.”
“No. If Klbkch can do it, so can I. Anything that damn bug can do I can do better. But hey, what’s this about a Human? Is it that female one I was telling you about?”
“She makes a mean plate of pasta, let me tell you. And she’s tougher than she looks—I didn’t think any Human could survive out in the Floodplains that long. She’s funny too.”
“Remember that [Necromancer] guy I told you me and Klbkch tracked down? She wouldn’t let us kill him even after he blasted us both with a few spells. Just kept saying that he wasn’t that bad.”
“Hey! Slither off, you little bastards!”
“But that’s what you think.”
“Right, right. But, uh, good to see you made it to the city. So how’d you like it?”
“Sausages. Mm. But hey, why didn’t you buy any clothes? I thought all females loved clothes, Drake or Human.”
“Look, I’m still really sorry about before. I didn’t mean—well, I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”
“Until later, Miss Erin.”
“Two coppers per ear…nah. Stick. Stick. You’ve gotta put them on sticks and—you know what? She can figure out how she wants to mount them.”
“They’re interesting and entertaining, but they don’t have much inside their fleshy heads. I’d never trust a Human to have my back. Drakes stick together and Humans do their thing in the north, am I right?”
“It’s not often I get to rescue a damsel in distress. That’s what they call Human females, right? Damsels? Anyways, I saw you were in trouble, so I immediately rushed to help.”
“So. You bought food, huh? Making lots of pasta tonight?”
“It’s fine.”
“I didn’t have enough money.”
“Thanks for helping. With the Goblins.”
“Right at the start. Did you see her expression? Relc’s not gonna have an easy time explaining that.”
“I really didn’t mean it. It’s just—[Necromancers], y’know? They’re dangerous. And it’s best to kill them on sight.”
“I’m going to sleep.”
“Good, good.”
“No offense meant, Miss, but how’d you trade a gold coin for a sack or two of flour?”
“It was nothing. They’re no threat to me or anyone with a few levels in any warrior class. But don’t worry about those pests. I said I’d make it up to you, didn’t I? I’ll do something about them.”
“Got you bastards. You can’t run from Relc! Damn, I thought there were three of you? Whatever. If Erin doesn’t love this—now I need to find some wood. Damn. I should be having dinner!”